I just heard the phrase "I heart you for everything. Thanks so much." Oh, English, English...you charming slattern, you. Words become symbols and back again. I expect to hear "Ell-oh-Ell" in response to something funny--oh, any second now.
 
Working with fingers in ears. Our office space is expanding, and I happen to be situated in an office directly across from the construction. The builders are working their bums off to get all the new offices and workstations ready, which means a certain amount of noise and dust. They had a classic rock station playing on the radio yesterday until G., the senior designer, strode out of his office with a thundercloud growing over his head. I don't know to whom he talked or what was said, but today our end of the office has been mercifully Supertramp- and Doors-free.
 
Also forgot to mention Best Movie Seen So Far in a Year: That would be "Children of Men." I saw it this past Saturday and can't stop thinking about it. It's not a perfect film, but it does have moments of perfection. Though I think I didn't breathe much over the last 20 minutes. Gratuitous copywriter observation: this movie includes a brilliant, brilliant product name. And I know I'll have to see it again to catch all the background details, which are also ingenious.
 
Posted by Hane2SO4 at 2:52 PM | Link
 

How could I have forgotten? Nik also gave me a copy of "Trouble on Tarragon Island" as well as a copy of the book she wrote after our 2002 Nevada book tour, "Jo's Journey." I was stunned to find that I'd been mentioned on the dedication page of "Jo's Journey"--stunned and delighted. Of course, had I been a true friend, I would have found out about this much earlier by ordering a copy of Nik's book. Nik didn't say this, of course, but that thought had to be there somewhere. Anyhow, once again: thank you, Nik.
 
Posted by Hane2SO4 at 10:18 AM | Link
 

Congrats, me old! Just found out that Nik, Old Pal and Established Writer, has been nominated for a Shining Willow Award by the SYRCA (Saskatchewan Young Readers' Choice Awards) for her book, "Trouble on Tarragon Island." What I love about Nik's books is what I love about C.S. Lewis's books, i.e., that they're written for young readers, but are just as enjoyable for adults. Anyway, great, great news, Nik.
 
We, that is, Nik and I, have been yapping our heads off lately about plans for the future, which (we're sure) involves us retiring together on some animal-festooned farm. The Idylls of Oscar and Felix. I'm just trying to work out where the unlimited wealth, boundless good health and muscular young stablehands come in. I've got the Jane part--the curmudgeonly sentimentalist--down cold.
 
Posted by Hane2SO4 at 10:09 AM | Link
 

Taking the "Mel" out of "melanoma," or rather the opposite. A month and change after his operation, Dad finally, finally received his biopsy results in a three-part report. The news is heartening overall: none of the biopsied lymph nodes showed any melanoma invasion. There is a bit of what's called "atypical melanocytic hyperplasia," and so far as we know, this will need to be pruned from Dad's innards in another operation.
 
I don't know if Mad Melvin can let himself relax now. I doubt the cautious older brother will indulge in exultation. But I have been frolicking steadily since hearing from Dad. The fight's not over, and I know that. But this is so much more positive than the grim prognosis that was our family's to deal with last November.
 
Not off the hook, BC Health Care. It takes more than a month to get results from a biopsy on a cancer infamous for its accelerated rate of metastasis? Unbelievable.
 
Not that I'm going to dwell on that. Fight on, mad Dad, fight fight FIGHT!
 
Posted by Hane2SO4 at 2:34 PM | Link
 

O crapjous day, calloo callay. Came in to the office earlier than usual to get some mighty, MIGHTY important work done. Tried to log in. Note: I was given a mini Mac a couple of weeks ago, and although it is most cute and sweet in proportion, I haven't been having much luck with it. To wit: logging in results in jellywheel after jellywheel. Fuggit, let's shut the machine down.
 
Turn Mac back on. Now I'm locked out of all servers. And the cheery IT zygote, who was my friendly passenger in SoccerMom this past weekend for the Banff party, is sick today. The two other people who have a crotch-hair's chance of being able to help me? One's at school, and the other isn't in yet.
 
Two and a half hours later...Jane is back online. By now I have gone past extreme vexation and am finding everything utterly hilarious. Imagine a copywriter in this day and age being reduced to [eek] writing on paper WITH A PEN! Astonishment! Tableau!
 
Of course, yoga restored a measure of calm and balance. So the day wasn't completely crapjous. Except that Cacomixl and his bride can no longer accompany me to the High Performance Rodeo tonight--but no matter, no matter. Namaste, namaste, namas-freakin'-te.
 
Posted by Hane2SO4 at 4:46 PM | Link
 

Not much of a milestone. I forgot yesterday to mention that it was the 10th anniversary of getting drop-kicked from Carswell Legal Publishing. I know I'm getting older when a decade just seems like a couple of years. A lot of the Carswellians still hang around together, and probably will forever. It was a funny company that way. What happened 10 years ago was not so funny, of course. There probably is no easy way to downsize a company of long-term employees, but lemme tell ya, treating them like maximum-security offenders is definitely NOT the way to do it.
 
Perspective on the workfront. I may not like a couple of the people I have to work closely with at present. I certainly don't trust them, and I'm sure they neither like nor trust me. But I'm grateful for their presence, because they're knocking me out of a stubborn rut I've been unhappy in for months. And with that gratitude as part of my daily perspective, I can be civil to these pox-ridden, scheming political chancres who'd throw me under the bus for air miles.
 
Ahhhh. Middle age RULES.
 
New Rule to Live By, sigh... When you don't drink, don't smoke and can't overeat, you gotta' deal. Wah.
 
Posted by Hane2SO4 at 4:14 PM | Link
 

Oh, SURE you quit drinking. At the company Christmas party in the spiffy Banff Springs Hotel, over the course of the evening, I (a) spill a cup of coffee all over myself, (b) have a quick chuck in the ladies restroom, and (c) get a bad post-chuck case of hiccups. Spilled the coffee when I was getting up from the table, and the crocheted hem of my skirt caught on my right heel, sending me lurching forward against the table's edge. Had the chuck because I just HAD to try the mango soufflé, and the tiny tum suddenly went on strike--a normal post-bypass hazard. The hiccups, well, they're the diaphragmmatic aftershocks. Let's recap: the 7-month non-drinking Jane spills, barfs and hiccups at a company fete. My reputation as a drinker is safe.
 
I'd had all these plans to get up early and go for a workout in the swanky hotel gym, then go skating on the outdoor pond, then have a healthy breakfast of muesli before checking out. Woke up late, discovered that the Judy Holliday movie, The Marrying Kind, was just starting, and lazed in my king-sized, down-duvet-mantled bed until 10 minutes before checkout. SCORE.
 
Posted by Hane2SO4 at 11:03 AM | Link
 

It's beginning to look a lot like... like the long-awaited Karo Christmas party, that's what. We'd booked a hall back in early autumn 2006, but that fell through when the venue management contacted us in November to say, whoops, we double-booked on the day you wanted, so here's what we're going to do for you: jack shit. By then it was months too late to get a new party venue. So January 13th in Banff National Park it is, poor poor us. How cruel of Karo to put me up in the Banff Springs hotel for a night, after feeding and feting me. Croo-ell.
 
Most of my coworkers are heading out to downhill ski, cross-country ski, or snowboard, but the petulant lunchsacks in my thorax still aren't 100 percent recovered from their recent pneumonia. So skating on the hotel rink it is. Besides, although I'm probably jinxing myself to say it, I'm less likely to get horribly injured skating.
 
Tonight I'm seeing another show at the High Performance Rodeo, one called "Billy the Kid." Although this will be my third show of the Rodeo this year, I haven't seen what I call the standard shock punctuation, i.e., the unexpected penis, in anything yet. But there should be some form of gunplay, nod nod, in Billy the Kid at least. I'll keep you posted.
 
Posted by Hane2SO4 at 5:00 PM | Link
 

Still no news on the mad dad's biopsy results--his G.P. thinks this may be the old no=good news scenario. Anyway, to keep from fretting, I've embarked on my latest diversion, classic movies. Right now anything with Judy Holliday is top of the list, particularly "Born Yesterday." I can listen countless times to her saying "And as fah as I'm concoined...Vice-hah, Voice-hah!" ("And as far as I'm concerned, vice-versa.") In fact, if I could use her "Billie Dawn" voice for ring tones, for clock alarms, for function alerts, etc., I would.
 
Oi, Nik! Any chance of us dropping in on Dani and Pete chez eux? Let's chat.
 
Posted by Hane2SO4 at 4:16 PM | Link
 

Jane Behaving Badly. I started my latest acting class, the long-awaited Shakespeare scene study course for which I was on a waiting list since August. Then it turned out that Joe, the instructor, decided to run two Shakespeare classes a week, on Mondays and Thursdays. This past Monday night was the debriefing session for both, and I was quite excited to be mounting the steps of Company of Rogues once again.
 
Then I saw them, sitting in the studio: two people I had hoped never to be in classes with again, or possibly ever to see again. People I'd been stuck in classes with for over a year when I was taking the Master Course.
 
Look, it's a drama studio in Calgary, i.e., not really able to turn people away who can pay for the courses, despite the fact that they have no talent but do have a surplus of repellent social habits. [Proof: the studio takes me, after all.] So the two women in question are well known for being loud-mouthed kibbitzers, continually disrupting class with badly timed and tactless comments. I doubt I was the only one who was less than thrilled to see them again.
 
But I bet I was the only one to hiss, "Oh, for fuck's sake" when I caught sight of them. Cut to Jane suddenly fumbling in pocket for cellphone, staring at it indignantly, then saying, "I knew I'd forget to turn the damned thing off," as though it were the natural followup to her first sentence. So that people wouldn't think her outburst had anything to do with seeing the two horrible females. Because that's what we call ack-TING!
 
Okay, so I could afford to pick up my acting skills, yeah. Anyway, turns out that the horrible twosome are in the Monday class, not my Thursday night class. So I can just shut the hell up.
 
Posted by Hane2SO4 at 2:14 PM | Link
 

Notes from the New Year, greatly condensed:

• Dad's operation goes as scheduled on Dec. 21st. He is sent home the same day. He has a quiet Christmas and New Year. He's still waiting for the biopsy results, which means we're all waiting.
• My Christmas in Modesto was fantastic, thanks to Les and John and the kids. I get an avalanche of presents, including a bellydancing workout tape. Ching-ching-a-ching-ching! Woo!
• Two Christmas curveballs. On Dec. 23rd Les and I are out shopping and we get hit by a motorcyclist. We're driving in a turn-only lane, and the straight-through traffic in the lane to our right has come to a stop. Suddenly a motorcycle darts out from two cars beside, cutting directly in front of us. The biker had not even turned his head to check out our lane. Les, with superb reflexes, manages to hit the horn and the brakes simultaneously, but we still collide with the biker, who is knocked off his road rocket. He says he's all right, but that we've just bought a motorcycle. Yeah, pal, and since when is it okay to change lanes without looking? The police officer who takes our statements is adorable and much too young. Les is slightly shaken, but recovers magnificently. Second curveball: Jane gets a recurrence of her early winter favourite, Double Pneumonia, last enjoyed in Nov. 2004. Les and John get to have a hacking wheezing lump in their guesthouse and living room for 8 days. Sorry about that, kids.
• Calgary doctor to Jane: "Couldn't you have gone to a clinic or something in California?"
• Dogs seem glad to see me. Piper gives me a loving swipe with a paw that results in impressive scratches on neck.
• New Year's Eve: Barkety-hackety-druggalicious. Wake up at 11:55 p.m. Stay up five minutes. Happy new year, pups. Return to drug-induced slumber.
• Watch a raft of DVDs. Discover that Truffaut's "Day for Night" really is one of the best movies of the 20th century.
• Amazingly, despite the forced inactivity, fail to read any of the books bought for the holidays. But the biography of Samuel Pepys is astounding and addictive, and I'll conquer it soon.

 
Posted by Hane2SO4 at 12:12 PM | Link